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The Teddy Bear Knight

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    The Teddy Bear Knight

    "Finally! We made it!" Alex said, opening the door to a tavern. The room inside was dark, only light by torches and candles. Long wooden tables and benches were spread half haphazardly over dirty floor boards, and drunken patrons laughed loudly over mugs of beer. "Now lets get drunk!"

    "Yes, that appears to be what we normally do at this part of our quests," Julian said. He was tall, with elfin ears and short black hair.

    Alex sat down heavily on a bench and spread his legs wide. He waved broadly at the bar to summon the waiter and held up three fingers.

    "I believe they expect you to go up to the bar," Julian said.

    "Nonsense! They'll do what we pay them to do. With what we just made on that quest we can surely make it worth their while," Alex held up gold coins between his fingers. "Besides, I'm no maid or waitress, I don't serve drinks. I'm a warrior! Manliest of trades!"

    "Are you sure you should be saying that? Given you're... issue," Julian said.

    Alex glared. "DON'T. BRING. THAT. UP. It makes it worse. But yes, that was an odd thing to say."

    "Wait, bring what up?" Joshua, the third member of their group, asked. He was shorter then the others and dark haired, and had come in as a bard.

    "Alex's weakness," Julian said.

    "What weakness?"

    "NO! Don't say it. I don't have a weakness."

    Julian looked at Alex. "Well you know how every member of our party has strengths and weaknesses? Like how my strategy and deduction are tempered by an inability to understand human behavior?"

    "Yes, I thought that was just a cultural difference."

    He shrugged. "Either way, Alex has his own."

    "Don't say it! I'll fight you!" Alex said, getting angry. "I'm going to get the drinks."

    Joshua was surprised. "Did he just challenge you?"

    "Yes its part of the curse. He didn't mean it."

    Alex returned with drinks, and they all began sipping. A moment later a tall, muscular man came to the door.

    "Package for Alex!" he shouted out.

    "Here!" Alex said. "This must be the new armor I ordered. Best blacksmiths in the country. I already threw my other stuff out."

    "Was that a good idea before you've seen it?" Joshua asked.

    "I believe you are about to witness his weakness."

    The muscular man handed Alex a large cardboard box.

    "Huh, seems really light," Alex said. He opened up the box. "HEY! What gives!"

    "Something wrong, sir?" the blacksmith said.

    "Its made out of plastic!" Alex shouted. He held a large, purple shield with a teddy bear etched into it. "And why is there a teddy bear on it?"

    "You said 'bear themed." We kind of filled in the blanks."

    "A collar?!"

    "Neck guard."

    "Yes, like a grizzly bear! Oh Jesus," Alex took out a long foam baton with a rattle at one end, colored with purple and blue stripes. "Is this supposed to be my 'sword?'


    "A collar?!"

    "Neck guard."

    "What else is in here? I..." he stopped and blushed. "Oh."

    "What is it?" Joshua asked.

    "I'm not taking it out."

    "Yes, the request filled in the box for 'infant,' then requested armour, so we assumed it was for a child. Hence the rest of it."

    "No, no, I thought that meant I fought on foot."

    "Oh, I can see the confusion," he said.

    "WHo was dumb enough to think something sized for a 6' man was for a baby?"

    "Anyone else find it odd we have cardboard and plastic but still use torches and steel swords?" Joshua asked, but was ignored, as it wasn't relevant to the story.

    The blacksmith folded his arms and glowered. "Hey now, we get all sorts here. Dwarves, elves, giants, this wasn't an odd order."

    "Whatever. Can I get it replaced? Same order, but real?"

    He shook his head. "Sure thing sir, I apologize."

    The blacksmith left, leaving the box of toys behind.

    "Oh god," Alex put his head in his hand.

    "What else is in there?" Joshua asked.

    "A large diaper and a purple sweater with a heart on it. A hood with teddy bear ears. Booties." Julian said.

    "What?! Really?!"

    "Uggh why do these things always happen to me?" Alex moaned.

    "Well it can't be that bad. A simple misunderstanding on..."

    "No, no, he's right. These things just always happen to him," Julian said. "Its his weakness. Reverse Plot Armour."

    "Reverse what now?"

    "DON"T say it. It makes it worse."

    Julian ignored Alex and kept going. "You know how some fictional characters have 'plot armor?" No matter how bad the scenario or ridiculous the odds, they will succeed and end up looking good, because the universe wants them too succeed?"


    "Alex is the reverse. The universe wants him to fail."


    "Its like his entire life is being written by a deranged author who wants him to be humiliated. No matter how hard he trains or works, in certain situations he will always lose and be embarrassed."

    "Really? But... we just completed a quest together! He fought off..."

    Julian waved his hand for silence. "Yes, yes, it has to be under the right circumstances. Specifically, when his pride is at stake. Observe. You have seen Alex drink multiple beers, correct?"


    "Don't you dare!" Alex said.

    Julian picked up a drink and handed it to Alex. "Hey Alex, can you drink this easily, or are you too immature to not spill it?"

    "What!? I'm not imma... Shit!" he shouted as the beer poured over him.

    "See? Now watch what happens."

    "No, no you triggered it! You @$$#0!%!"

    The owner of the bar, a short, fat and balding man, came up to Alex. "Hey! Are you spilling those drinks!? I see you can't be trusted with a glass."

    "What!? That's a weird thing to say! What are you, HEY! What!?"

    Alex was ignored as the bartender put a baby bottle full of beer in front of him. "I'm not drinking from that!" He picked it up and threw it against a wall.

    "That's it! You are going to have to clean that up!"

    "I'm not! Hey, let me go!" Alex struggled as the man grabbed his wrist and pulled him up. He pulled and punched, but couldn't break the man's grasp as he dragged Alex accross his lap. "Nooo let me go!"

    "You either stop struggling or I'm going to treat you like any other misbehaved child!" He raised his hands and began spanking Alex, who moaned and shouted.

    "The bartender is really rough," Joshua said.

    "Oh, no, he only does this toward Alex. See, watch," Julian picked up the two remaining beers and threw them against the wall.

    The bartender stopped what he was doing and smiled. "Oh, I'm sorry sir, we'll get that cleaned up and replaced for you. On the house. Have a nice day!" He then went back to spanking Alex, who was sobbing, but still struggling. The bartender pulled down his pants and continued on his bear bottom.

    "I've seen Alex outfight monsters twice his size," Joshua said.

    "Yes," Julian replied.

    "And now he can't outfit an aging fat guy?"

    He shrugged. "Its part of the curse."

    They both watched as their friend was beaten into submission, then lead up and marched sobbing through the bar with his pants around his legs.

    "Should we do something?"

    "No, this usually will play itself out."

    "So... I mean, doesn't that kind of make him useless? He's supposed to be a warrior but can't fight?"

    Julian shook his head. "No, its only when Alex is challenged or brags about certain topics."

    "Soo... if the challenge makes him seem immature or incompetent, he will fail? What else?"

    "Oh, anything that challenges his manliness. Think of it this way. If he becomes the best lock pick in the world, he will still be thwarted by anything labelled 'child safety lock,' and have his failure publicly seen. Its the same with his bragging, he doesn't even normally care unless you invoke the Reverse Plot Armor. Watch," he cupped his hands to his mouth and shouted. "Hey Alex! Isn't cleaning up stuff like that a maids job? I thought you were a big tough warrior?"

    "Yeah! I can't do this! I'm a guy... uh oh, why would I say that..."

    "Disrespecting woman I see!" a feminine voice said. A woman, as short and wide as the bartender with mangled hair and wearing an apron, came out of a backroom. "We will see about that."

    "Please no!" Alex continued his fruitless struggling as he was brought into the back.

    "What now?" Joshua asked.

    Julian shrugged. "You are likely about to see one of the oddest and most common sights in our group: Alex forcibly cross dressed."

    "Huh. Should we do something? How long does this last?"

    "As long as Alex keeps on saying stupid things. Which is... never, really, once the curse starts. Usually he'll end up humiliated publicly, then it will die down and he will go back to normal. People will forget when they see him again, and it repeats."

    There was a loud hooting and hollering. They looked at the back of the room as Alex was lead in wearing a maid's dress and carrying a bucket of water and a tray of drinks. The men in the bar all ogled him as he walked his way through to where the beer had been spilled.

    "And we have plenty more chores for you to do after that, girl," the older woman said.

    "Yeah yeah yeah," Alex muttered, trying to ignore her as much as the hollering. He made it to the table with the other two and handed them their drinks. He then got down on his hands and knees, and began scrubbing.

    "So that is it? Maturity and masculinity?" Joshua asked.

    "Usually, but it can have other effects. We tried a few times to see what triggered it with odd results. Once we got him to brag about his being human.."


    "The curse leads to some odd statements. Anyway, we found him wearing a leash and being treated as a princesses 'pet dog.' Another time it was that he was capable of making decisions. We found him tied up and immobile. Normally its this or something like his armor."

    "I see. Can I try?"

    "Don't you dare!" Alex said.

    "Sure why not?" Julian said.

    Joshua thought for a moment. "Hmmm... Hey Alex. I see you crawling like that, don't only babies do that?"

    "Well no, I have to do it to get to..."

    He was cut off as the bartender lifted him straight into the air and cradled him.

    "OH come on! That one wasn't even weird, it was true!"

    "Hush now little one! No tantrums or you'll get a spanking! I can see that this sort of thing is too complicated for you. And what is this?" he held up a damp part of Alex's skirt. "Naughty! Not telling us when you needed to go!"

    "No that is beer! Help!" Alex shouted at his companions, kept drinking.



    They heard screams and please coming from the back room, followed by loud banging noises.

    "Should we help him?"

    "No, lets see this play out. I'm sure he's used to it at this point." Julian said.

    The banging sounds were soon replaced with sobbing.

    "I'm sure he'll be fine," Julian said.

    Alex re-appeared, this time suckling a pacifier. His dressed bulged out at his waist, and the short skirt flared up to show thick white plastic underwear under his skirt. The bar room was filled with laughter as people jeered at him. A few began to reach out and pat or grab his padded bottom, and another pulled him into his lap. Alex whined and moaned, but was helpless to stop it.

    Julian shook his head. "Poor Alex, diapered again."

    "Again?" Joshua asked.

    He nodded. "This really does just always happen to him."

    They watched as Alex suffered through a series of humiliations, getting pinched prodded from all sides, his diaper checked over and over, and spanked whenever he fought back. One held him down and began feeding him a bottle of milk.

    "I suppose we really should do something," Julian said.


    "There is a plan. One moment," He took out a cell phone and dialed a button.

    "See! There it is again! We live in meadival castles but have cell phones?!"

    "Quite. Its magic," Julian said.


    "Hello," Julian said into the phone. "Its Julian, about Alex. Yes, it happened again. In the pub at the edge of town. Yes. Skirts and diapers, so ABDL and sissy. Alright, see you soon."

    "Who was that?"

    "You'll see."

    A read haired girl, wearing light armor and carrying a spear and a bow, came into the taveran. "Ah! You've found my baby!" she shouted, and walked toward Alex.

    "What? Ka..." Alex began, dropping his pacifier.

    "Shhhh now," she pushed the pacifier back into his mouth. "Who found my baby?"

    The bartender came our from behind the bar. "What? Is she yours?"

    "Yes, he... she, is mine. She got lost a while ago and I've been looking. Thank you so much for finding... her."

    "Is that true?" he looked at Alex.

    Alex first glared, then clamed down and looked wide eyed from the girl to the bartender. He then nodded. "She's my..." he stopped, and they all looked at him.

    The girl nudged him. "Say it or we'll never get out."

    "She's my mommy..." he said. The bar cooed at his confession, and the girl took him out.

    "Well, we should pay and see whats going on," Julian said. He left money on the table, Joshua grabbed the box of toy armor, and they both left.

    Outside the girl was scolding Alex. "What did you get into this time? Huh? BAD BABY!" She held a rolled up news paper and smacked him on the head.

    "Hey! Kacey! Don't you..."

    "Don't talk with your pacifier in your mouth! You know that!" she smacked him again.

    Julian put a hand on her shoulder. "Now now, you know its his curse making you do that."

    She paused. "Ohh riiighht! Sorry Alex!'

    "Don't mention it. Seriously, please don't mention this ever again. Now let me get out of these. You have a change of clothes?"

    "I don't know if thats the best idea," the girl said.

    "Yes," Julian added. "Normally after and incident like this its a good idea for you to remain diapered for at least a few days incase... you know..."

    Alex rolled his eyes. "FINE! But let me get out of this dress. You have any other clothes?"

    Joshua held up the box.

    "Oh you have got to be kidding me."

    Alex, now dressed from head to to toe in play armor, with a diaper serving as his only protection beneath and his top being a purple hooded teddy bear sweater, stomped through town back to his camp to change.

    "Stupid weakness!" he muttered. "It could have been some stone or the color yellow or fried chicken, but noooo it has to be stupid Reverse Plot Armor. This is all so ridiculous. I could have taken any one of those guys at the bar... no, ALL of them AT ONCE, if it weren't for..." he was cut off by people laughing. "HEY! You keep quiet or I swear I'll beat you with just this foam rattle!" He shouted, pointing the toy at them. "You want to be the guys who lost a fight to a guy in a diaper?" He hit a barrel with the sword and the barrel shattered. The others became afraid and ran away. Alex went back to walking and muttering. He left the town and ended up in a forest, where he began angrily casting the toy armor into the forest.

    "Stupid fake armor. As if THAT was their mistake. Like that's a normal thing to confuse. Wouldn't happen to anyone else, I swear..." he stopped and jolted as he ran into someone's back while pulling his sweater off. The person, slightly shorter then Alex, fell to the ground. "Hey!" Alex said. "Don't you know that little people like you need to pay attention to bigger people like me? I... wait, that was a weird thing to say... oh @#$%..." He stopped as a sudden realization came over him.

    The person he hit, whom he assumed to be human, turned around. He was crying, and had a wooden soother in his mouth. "Uh ohh..." Alex said.

    A massive shadow covered him. He turned around to see two giants behind him, both looming over him and glaring. He looked back at the person he hit. A giant's baby, crying. He then looked at himself, the same size as the giant's baby, wearing only a diaper, and who had just hurt their son. He looked up at the giants, who glared at him. "Oh for heck's sake!" Alex said as he was hoisted into the air.
    I was so much older then, I'm younger then that now.

    Part 2:
    Alex grumbled to himself as he rode on the back of the giant. He was swaddled tightly in a bag that left him almost immobile with his knees to his chest.. He was gagged by a large wooden pacifier that he knew better then to spit out. Worse still, the thick cloth diaper the giants had put him in was soaked and used, and the tightness of the bag and movement of their running pushed it against him.

    It had been several days since his most recent captivity. The giants seemed to have assumed he was one of theirs and adopted him, leaving him as part of an extended family of multiple giants. They then carried him, far faster then any human could run, for miles across forests and plains as he hung helplessly on their backs. They couldn't understand English, and he couldn't understand them, and nothing he did or said could convince them he wasn't what they assumed he was.

    He grumbled. He had slain giants before. ARMIES of giants. But thanks to the curse, the last thing he said before meeting them guaranteed he couldn't fight back. Any struggle had resulted in getting spanked over a giant knee. He winced. It was bad enough with other humans, but with a giants massive arm... even through the ridiculously thick cloth diapers they used, it hurt.

    He hated it that he know enough to judge that the diapers he was wearing were ridiculously thick. The various situations the universe brought him to had left him with more then enough experience to know.

    They finally stopped for the night, and let Alex down. He was un-wrapped and had his diaper checked as he grumbled with his arms around his chest. The giant sniffed and groaned, moving a hand in front of his nose.

    "Yeah well thats what you get for leaving me tied up all day," Alex said.

    He was carried to the pile of moss that they used as a changing table and lay down on it with a few other, actual, babies.

    "What are you looking at?" he said to the one beside him as they were both changed side by side. He had gone through this enough in various circumstances to know the drill, and went along. The embarrassment, however, never left, and he blushed and glared through the entire process. He wondered if not getting used to it was part of the curse, or just a natural reaction to having the bare minimum pride stripped away. Alex was wrapped back into another cloth diaper and deposited in the ring of sticks that served as a play pen.

    He got up for what was now a nightly ritual. "Hey! Giant idiots!" he said.

    A few turned to look at him. "Me, HUMAN! ME, Grown adult, not baby!"

    They looked at him. One cocked his head to his side. Another picked him up and padded his diaper.

    "No! I just got changed! I.. no!" he had a bottle of milk shoved into his mouth and drank until the giant was satisfied, then was dropped back in.

    "No! Look!" he pointed at the baby, then made a crossing motion with his hand. "NOT BABY!" He pointed at the older giant. "ME ADULT! Like him!" The older giant picked up Alex and cuddled him until he stopped shouting, then put him back in.

    "You goddam idiots I'm Alex! I'm a human hero! I'm famous! I SLAY giants like you! ERRR..." frustrated, Alex ran up to the play pen wall, kicked it over, jumped out and kept running. He was picked up by one of the gaints who turned him over his knee.

    "NOOO not this again! OW! OW!" the giants arm came up and down, leaving Alex screaming and moaning. The giant's spankings were never as long as the ones he retrieved from humans, but they hurt far more. Each solid thuck of the hand on his diaper hurt Alex's ears and echoed through the woods. Alex didn't bother to struggled, he only whined as the pain mounted and prayed for it to end. Soon he was in tears, begging outloud for it to stop. A moment later the giant sat him on his lap, waggled a finger in his face, and carried him back to the pen. He sat Alex in a hanging leather swing the left his legs dangling, the giant's equivalent of a baby bouncer, and turned away.

    Alex huffed. "Since when is it normal to spank babies anyway? Don't look at me!" he shouted at the babies. "At least no one is here to see me like this..." he said.

    Later that night he was let down from the swing and fed a bottle of milk. The giant who had spanked him, looking guilty, approached with a bag. He made a noise, and petted Alex's hair. Alex realized he was trying to make it up to him.

    The giant reached into the bag and took something out. Alex's eyes went wide. He held up the plastic shield he had had earlier, then followed it with the rest of the outfit. Alex realized he was trying to make a gift of it to cheer him up.

    Alex was set down on the ground, then dressed in the fake armor. The giant smiled and clapped when he was done, leaving Alex in the ridiculous play outfit. Alex forced a smile and waved the rattle around. At least the giant had tried, he thought.

    He 'played' with the toys and the other babies as the giants watched in amusement. Later he was picked up and tightly wrapped in a blanket, then left to sleep in the same immobile state he always did, with the fake weapons in extra layers of blanket beside him. It was the tight wrapping that served as good as ropes, or any of the bondage gear he had been in, that kept him from running way at night.

    Alex woke up in the middle of the night. Everyone was sleeping. He didn't know what, but something had changed.

    The blankets! They were lose! He wiggled a bit. The extra material of the sweater had allowed him to slide a bit, letting him move. The fake sword and shield created more space.

    He wiggled some more, and the blankets became loser. He had to keep from laughing out loud in happiness.

    He wiggled again, and finally the blankets gave way. He stifled the desire to cheer and got up. He was careful to not make any noise. To his surprise, the soft booties he had been given muffled his footfalls, and the cloth diaper that came with the outfit made far less noise then the plastic ones he normally wore.

    He paused and thought. It was KIND of weird that a society with only wooden furniture also had plastic disposable diapers sized for adults. It was as if technology changed when it came to kinks. He shrugged his shoulders and kept going.

    He had to find a way out of the play pen, then over the ditch and palisade the giants around the campsite- he had trained himself to notice such things- without making too much noise. It would be all to easy to kick it over normally, but that would leave him having to fight dozens of giants, or go back to being their 'baby.'

    He thought, and looked at his toys, and smiled.

    He lifted the sword over his head and hooked the rattle into the upper reaches of the pen. He tested it, and was surprised by its strength. Using it as a grapple, he climbed up and over.

    He looked around. There was a guard at the gate, so that was out. However, there were some spaces in the palisade. Climbing it like a parkour wall and jumping off would make too much noise.

    He ran to it and wedged the sword in, then climbed onto it. He then wedged the shield above it, climbed onto that, and grabbed his sword. He fell, hit the ground, and paused. Two nearby giants stirred, and he waited. Both soon went back to snoring, and he tried again. Soon he was over the wall and down the other side, and ran through the ditch.

    Soon he was running through the trees laughing to himself. He was free! All he had to do now was find out where he was and find a way back, but he was Alex, this sort of thing was normal. He ran for hours, breathlessly. This was easy for him, he could run longer then almost any human he knew. The sun began to rise, and he broke out of the woods and into a field, and ran faster. He cheered loudly and began to strip off the toys. He threw the sweater off, he could make one with animal skins that suited him better. He threw away the shield and the sword, then the dreaded diaper and pacifier.

    He tripped and fell to the ground. He rolled around a bit, laughing. "I'm free! I'm free!" he said. "Never again will I.. huh?"

    He looked up. There were dozens of people around him. They were of multiple races, but all held whips, weapons, and ropes. Behind the crowed, he saw a cage with people in it. Slavers, he realized, the type of person he hated the most. He looked at the bondage gear they carried. Not slavers, kink doms. The people in the cages were subs. They were all glaring at him.

    He looked at himself. Naked, wearing a collar, and shouting "I'm free."

    "Oh... @#$," he said.
    I was so much older then, I'm younger then that now.


      Your spell checker is very efficient at finding correct spellings for words you've nearly typed. These may however not be the words you intended, so perhaps a review of the corrections before approving them may aid readability.


        Originally posted by BabyAnna View Post
        Your spell checker is very efficient at finding correct spellings for words you've nearly typed. These may however not be the words you intended, so perhaps a review of the corrections before approving them may aid readability.
        Thank you! Which issues did you notice in particular?
        I was so much older then, I'm younger then that now.


          Without going through all of it (i.e. I only got as far as him being taken out the back of the bar)


            Originally posted by BabyAnna View Post
            Without going through all of it (i.e. I only got as far as him being taken out the back of the bar)
            Thank you!
            I was so much older then, I'm younger then that now.


              Honestly, this is a cute side trip from what I'm used to seeing from you. I applaud the efforts, and while I see the errors, they don't distract from the story to a degree that I can't follow it.


                Originally posted by WBDaddy View Post
                Honestly, this is a cute side trip from what I'm used to seeing from you. I applaud the efforts, and while I see the errors, they don't distract from the story to a degree that I can't follow it.
                LOL well I'm glad you like this one, thanks for saying so
                I was so much older then, I'm younger then that now.