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Kimmy's return to infancy

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    Kimmy's return to infancy

    Hello guys this is my first attempt at a abdl story please leave feedback, also note that i would like to have a proof reader since english is not my native language , thank you all and have a crinkly awesome day!



    Hello, my name is Kim, im your regular 14 year old high school student, ive always been short for my age at barely 5'1 for 110 pounds. The school year had just ended and my aunt was on the way to come take me to her country house for a few weeks since my parents had to gravel for something work related. Aunt Karen was by all means a country girl, her 6'0ft frame toned by hours of working in her homestead, it has been a few years since i saw aunt Karen and my parents told me she had recently adopted a little girl and that she was eager for us to meet.

    My aunt arrived early saturday morning as my dad ushered my half asleep self out of the house in a hurry, i could hear a vague conversation and myself being lifted off the ground before i went back to sleep.

    Aunt Karen had lifted Kim in her arms and placed her on her hip, causing my father to smile and say "take care of my little girl." Karen smiled and promised she would and that it would be the best vacation kimmy ever had, she then turned and walked back to her mini van opening the sliding door and stopped for a moment looking at the inside of the mini van, the back row of seats had been removed because she help a friend move recently so only 2 seats remained the problem was both had carseats installed since she forgot to take one of them out earlier, the other one was occupied by her daughter who was snoozing peacefully looking at her she realized they were both about the same size so gently she placed Kim in the other car seat and buckled her in.

    She was releived that it was a perfect fit and, before closing the door flipped up her daughters skirt exposing her diaper and witch a quick check of the wetness indicator she was back at the wheel and on the road leaving behind Kim's house and her luggage still sitting on the ground

    #2
    I think your fine as far as the English and grammar, a few missing apostrophes and capital letters but nothing too major.

    The actual story is a good start but it’s a bit too short in my opinion, also I think you should stick to writing from one perspective.

    What I mean is, you started writing it in the 1st person perspective (as if you're Kim telling her story) EG

    My aunt arrived early Saturday morning as my dad ushered my half asleep self out of the house in a hurry, I could hear a vague conversation and myself being lifted off the ground before I went back to sleep.

    Then all of a sudden you switch over to the 3rd person perspective (as if you're an invisible person documenting what you see the characters do) EG

    Karen lifted Kim in her arms and placed her on her hip, she placed Kim in the other car seat and buckled her in.

    Shouldn't that be

    Karen lifted ME in her arms and placed ME on her hip, she placed ME in the other car seat and buckled ME in?

    I would argue you can choose either 1st or 3rd person perspective but having both makes it a little confusing in my opinion.

    Anyway hope that's helpful


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